Cookie Rehab

Thin Mints: The most enduring and universally familiar
Girl Scout cookie. These round, mint-flavored cookies covered with dark chocolate perennially sell the most
boxes of any cookie. Thin Mints have never changed their name. These cookies
come in a dark green box. Little Brownie Bakers and ABC make Thin Mints.

Little did the Girl Scouts of America tell us on their cleverly packaged boxes that each serving of these cookies contains 500mg of pharmaceutical grade crack cocaine.

Damn suckers are addictive! You open a box of the little delights, with the intent of only eating 3, and before you turn arround half of the box has dissapeared into the caverns of your GI tract.

Those girls have the perfect business strategy: dispatch squadrons of cute little girls, all dressed up in their uniforms, with their soccer moms trailing along in the minivan parked on the side of the road. Why this is successful:

1. Cute little girls. How can you resist?
2. You know damn well that those cookies are good
3. You will get the glare from mom, who will remember your face and invaribly end up in front of you in the supermarket line or slow you down in traffic.

In other news, my hard drive has officially died. I expect to ship it back to Maxtor shortly, but that will have to wait till i get paid on friday. It would not be inacurate to say that i can probably scrape up more change in my vehicle than the ammount of cash i posess in my bank account.

As for my gallbladder, i am holding off on surgery for now. At the moment, the only thing to do is take it out, see if it helps, or keep it in, see if it gets better. If it is my gallbladder, then eventually it will rear its ugly head again and it will definately have a date with the laparoscope. for now, its lucky.

System Error

"The computer allows you to make mistakes faster than any other invention, with the possible exception of handguns and tequila." ~Mitch Ratcliffe

As far as sick computers are concerned, my computer is in the ICU. When i came home from work one night, i was alarmed to discover the following message on my monitor:

DISK READ ERROR

PRESS CTRL+ALT+DELETE TO RESTART

Mortified, i initated the computer version of a Code Blue: I called Denise.

Recognizing the gravity of the situation, i was reffered to Ray, the computer equivelant of a level 1 trauma center. If Ray cant fix it, then nobody can.

So now i wait while my PC is being worked on...it is living up to its given name of Ivan the Terrible.

In other news, i wish everyone a happy Singles Awareness Day (SAD). Or Valentines day if you happen to be in a relationship. But by now, im quite sick of hearing cheesy ass jewelry commercials everywhere...every kiss does NOT begin with KAY!! AGHHH!!

Toodles for now, im sure i will find the motivation to write something meaningful later. maybe. if we're lucky.

Diaphoresis!

Oh. My. Gods.

Let me tell you, that HIDA scan was HELL!

Allow me to rephrase...the first hour was just fine, because they were taking preliminary images of my gallbladder (which was then radioactive, by the way). Once most of the tracer has moved into the gallbladder, then the nurse comes in and injects you with CCK (cholecystokinin), the enzyme that makes your gallbladder contract.

As soon as she started pushing that CCK into my vein i instantly became symptomatic. I felt AWFUL, exactly the same as i did back in january when this whole thing started. My entire abdomen instantly became distended with gas, and it seemed like all of my blood drained from my limbs and went to my midsection. I was clammy, very nauseous, and my RUQ was burning some...not fun at all. talk about an apatite killer.

My ejection fraction (how well the gallbladder contracts) was 63 percent, which is excellent. However, because the CCK reproduced my same initial symptoms, that means there is some sort of disease process and it will probably mean i have a cholecystectomy (gallbladder removal) in the future.

Now that the test from hell is over (CCK should be outlawed) i go back to the surgeon on monday and we discuss whats going to happen. Ick.

Acute Cholecystitis

"Fear is that little darkroom where negatives are developed. "
Michael Pritchard

On Friday, February 10th, I will undergo a hydroxy iminodiacetic acid (HIDA) scan that will evaluate how well my gallbladder is functioning. If the scan reveals that my gallbladder has a low ejection fraction, or is not working properly, then it is likely that it will be removed surgically.

I think that being a healthcare worker makes it even more difficult when faced with a medical problem like this. Because of my education, im well aware of what is happening in my body, and what happens durring the procedure to correct it. I am acutely aware of the risks, and i know what can go wrong.

I'll make it a point to keep you all updated about whats going on, and the results of the test.